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Solstice Day and New Beginnings

I'm not sure where to start this blog today, so let's pick up where the last one left off. I'm no longer working at camp, I've said my goodbyes, left behind my quilt and some other nonessentials I forgot to pack (because really, beneath this gigantic scary brain, I'm a forgetful moron) and beat a path down the road that no one could keep up to. Apparently I left Fort McMurray so quickly, I got caught on photo-radar. They mailed me a ticket.

Anyway, on friday I was to go to Edmonton to pick up my special, handmade, one-of-a-kind solstice incense, but when I showed up, the guy (Ed by name) hadn't made it yet. He promised it would only take a few minutes if I didn't mind waiting. I assured him it was alright, and I would browse while he worked and told him not to rush. I was willing to be patient (yup, patient ;) ) mostly because I was afraid that if he rushed, he'd screw it up and I'd really be no further ahead. After a few minutes, Ed returned from the back, flustered and stuttering because he didn't have one of the ingredients. I calmly told him it was fine, asked what he suggested and tried really hard not to be threatening. You see, I'm a skinny, average height man, who looks most of the time like I'm twelve, even though I'm actually thirty. But for some reason (and I love it) people are intimidated by me; my deep, sometimes raspy voice, the hard stare I get when I'm concentrating, the energy I exude when I'm riled.... at least, that's how I see it. In any case, he pulled out Cunningham's incense and oils book and started flipping. I asked if he minded, took the book from him and perused the book myself. I found a few recipes for cleansing and decided on one that contained vervain and frankincense, being the simplest of the recipes (and one for which he had all of the ingredients) and he suggested that I make the incense myself. I nodded, thinking it a fantastic opportunity to learn and make my own personal incense. To get to the point of the story, Ed was further intimidated, I made incense, bought myself a mortar and pestle, and went home, reveling in my new abilities.

Saturday I went fishing, in the rain and caught three fishes.

Sunday I watched movies and napped.

Today (I'm skipping yesterday because I drove and it was dull, except for the curious fact that I didn't listen to anything but the noise in my head the whole way up) I started my new job. That is to say, I would have, but I was in orientation all day. It was likely the longest, most boring day I've had in ages. But tonight I'm going to perform my ritual, have some wine and relax, cleansed and new.

I'm excited that the library is open until 9pm most nights, so I'll still have a few minutes a day to blog and check my e-mail. As for Diane reading my blog, I don't know if she will or won't and she likely wouldn't tell me if she did. It doesn't matter. I wanted her to have the option open to her. It wouldn't change anything, as I speculated earlier, except to maybe give her a different perspective of me. I have a hard time expressing myself vocally, where when I write, words flow and ideas tumble out my fingers.

posted by September @ 6:54 PM