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Spaces

I feel out of place. When I was at the other job, I had my own spaces (my room, my cubicle, my head) but here, everywhere I turn, I'm in an open space, surrounded by people. I share an office now with three others; my suite in the basement doesn't have a door yet to close me off from the rest of the house; the computer I use is in the public library where they always stick me shoulder to shoulder with everyone else. I think I'm going to see if I can find a swimming pool tonight, spend some time under water.

Speaking of water, Tali's gaining ground again. I guess in the scheme of cycles, it's inevitable:

"Just relax," Tali whispered into Brant's ear, her breath hot as her lips brushed his ear lobe. He flushed a little, closing his eyes as she brought her fingers to the back of his neck and massaged him gently. He teetered slightly, threatening to collapse. She kissed him gently, just below the ear lobe and ran her hand down his back, pressing her body against him...

Sex. Not just sex, but sexuality, sensuality, hard and heavy, fierce, sweaty, biting. Tali rules emotion, like I've said, but also the physical sensations that go with them. Perhaps that's why she scares me. Where Trynn makes me think I'm losing my mind, Tali makes me think I'm losing my body. I'm afraid to just let her go, like I do the others, to explore and find out where it goes, where it comes from, what energy it draws and creates. She's too unpredictable and volatile, and holds no compunction for destroying the rest of us. She's not afraid to change reality to suit her.

posted by September @ 12:07 PM