I'm out
Alright, I'm officially tired of being sick. Having a cold or the flu is one thing, but this ear/sinus infection I've got is another. My head hurts, I can hardly breathe, my ears are ringing, my sense of balance is off, I'm dizzy.... It goes on and on. So, rather than suffering through the next couple of days at work (I've only been working half days for the last couple), I'm going home. It's a little early, but I think it's a good idea.
Having said that, I'm going to be offline for the next couple of weeks.
Enjoy your holidays, everyone.
Happy 2006.
Blind Truth
I'm at my best when I'm alone. And my worst. I've come to the conclusion that I'm reasonably empathic, and so I feed on the emotions of people around me. I rile people when I want to be riled; I tempt people when I want to be tempted; I try to balance the emotions of the people around me to make myself more balanced. But when I'm alone, I only have myself. I fight with myself, I depress myself, I laugh at myself....
I have a mind full of half thoughts and incomplete theories of philosophy, anthology, concepts of pasts that probably don't matter and futures that will happen only because I want them to.
I am abstract tonight.
Not hollow, but empty. And pregnant with possibility.
Revisited
Song
Low by fire light and gentle breeze,
Along the riverbank sat he,
And counted days that seemed to freeze
The blood that flow'd within him.
The branches quaked among the trees
As crouch'd he there on bended knee,
A raven croaked about the lees
A toad croak'd 'bout the shore's rim.
A storm roll'd past at ev'ning tide,
The lightning lit the evening sky,
And summer storms, they seemed to chide
The mourning that did haunt him.
Through the brushes she came astride
A mare that walk'd among the rye
And strolling there along beside
The fox that came to mock him.
And rising up from the fire side
He fix'd his eye the mounted sight,
She knell'd a song that did deride
The gloom that lurk'd within him.
Her notes rang soft about a bride
That came before the dawn's first light,
Who's confidence he put aside
And so his life would be dim.
Enchanted by her soulful notes,
He walked toward the stirring horse
And noticed not the silken oats
That grew among the sage brush;
Nor noted from the shored boats
The river had so swell'd it's course,
And swept away, the river gloats
As streams are want to so rush.
He let her down to soften'd ground,
The fox about them bounced and bound,
Their breasts together so did pound
As stormheads roll’d up on high.
So there upon the dewy mound,
The storm and river soak'd the ground,
Together they could not abound
Nor abate the angry sky.
So in the morning left he there
And mounted back upon her steed,
And straightened out her silken hair,
And she left without a sound.
Awaken'd by the July air,
By river's course and river's reed,
He cursed that then they so did pair,
And he wept upon the mound.
Elemental Healing
No, I'm not dead. Although yesterday I did feel that I might as well be. I've had a sinus infection for the passed few days that has had me up and down. I'm feeling better today (almost no achiness but my ears are still clogged and my throat is full of gunk). It's been a hectic week, with late nights that ran me down and let this friggin' virus get the best of me. It made me think of ways to use visualization of elements for healing. I pictured a fire moving through my body, burning away the impurities, wind blew off the ash, water rinsed my body clean and earth grew a new greenness inside me.
My christmas party was Wednesday night, followed by dinner with one of our suppliers on Thursday, followed by nearly living death on Friday. I took yesterday off of work to lay in bed, sleep in, play KOTOR II and Ninja Gaiden Black and sleep in between. I'm nothing if not resilient. Except maybe brilliant.
What else....
I'm done christmas shopping. Mostly. I just have to get a couple odd things and wrap like a madman. No big plans for the day this year. I'm just going to relax at home, with the family, watch the log show and sleep....
